Updated on June 3rd, 2025

Are you in a transitional phase in life? The lack of clarity, direction or visible progress that a hiatus brings can make us feel as though we’re on hold, stopped in our tracks or held back. The uncertainty about the future can play on our mind, making the hiatus an uncomfortable place to be. But don’t despair. Read on to find out why the hiatus experience is normal and valuable. Discover 19 ways to live through it with more ease!

A hiatus is a gap.  An interruption. An interval. It’s a break in continuity.

It’s like incessant rain stopping for a while. Or like the wave we’ve been surfing disappearing, leaving us stranded on a flat, windless sea. Or like winter after the plants have emerged, flourished and died back down throughout the year. A hiatus is the bit in between, where not much seems to happen, and we don’t know if the rain will continue, if we’ll surf a next wave again, or if fresh shoots will take nature into the next year.

Hiatuses can happen in our lives, too.

For example,

• a writer who publishes her first novel and then writes nothing for years.

• a young person takes a break after college before starting university.

• a seasoned professional loses their job, or takes a sabbatical after an intense year.

• a wife and mother finds herself floundering after the end of her marriage, or when the kids leave home.

• a sportsman is forced to stop because of an accident or an illness.

A hiatus can happen naturally, even voluntarily, such as  when you reach the end of  an era in your life – maybe when you quit a job or end a relationship. Or you can be thrown into it suddenly – for example, when you lose your job, your partner leaves you, or a loved one passes away unexpectedly.

The power of the hiatus: how life’s pauses make and shape us

We may not like hiatuses, but we all go through them. Even the most successful, admired, or seemingly unstoppable among us experience them — more than once, and often when we least expect it. Every life has its pauses. Those times when we feel stuck, lost, or in between phases. When nothing seems to move forward, and we’re not quite sure who we are anymore.

What I’ve come to understand is that these hiatuses are not detours or delays. They are important moments that shape us, even make us, preparing us for what comes next. When we’re not busy being someone, doing something, or rushing somewhere, we often come face-to-face with who we really are — and who we’re becoming.

In those still spaces, we might uncover deeper patience. Greater resilience. More compassion, wisdom, or clarity. Or perhaps a renewed determination to live in alignment with who we truly are.

So let me ask you:

Have you experienced a hiatus?
Or are you in the middle of one right now? Let us know in the comments section below!

Here are a few of mine:

• Grief in motion: After my father died suddenly when I was 27, I felt numb inside for years, even though on the outside, my career was thriving, as I poured myself into work, not yet ready to face the depth of my loss.

• A forced pause: Years later, a fast-growing — thankfully benign — brain tumour left me confused and exhausted, and I found myself unable to do much at all for the better part of a year, processing the news that I needed brain surgery. Preparing for it. Going through it. Recovering from it. (Happily, the surgery went well, happily.)

• A caregiving chapter: During the pandemic, I moved countries to become my ailing mother’s full-time carer. After she passed, I sat with the vast emptiness that followed — grieving both her loss and the life I had left behind. I didn’t know what would come next, or how to begin again.

There have been quieter hiatuses, too.

• Like staying too long in a job, relationship, or place that had clearly run its course — unable to face its end, unsure how to move on, or afraid of the uncertainty ahead.

• Or like stepping away from a traditional career path to search for my calling, which took me on a winding, trial-and-error journey. Enriching, yes — but often confusing, and not always linear. (You can read more about that here: Read my story

What I’ve learned — and continue to learn — is this:

Hiatuses are part of the rhythm of life. They may feel uncomfortable, uncertain, even painful at times. But they are also profoundly transformative. They invite us inward. They teach us to let go. They help us reconnect with what truly matters to us.

If you’re in a hiatus right now, know this: you’re not lost. You’re becoming.

And you don’t have to navigate it alone.

A hiatus is not what it seems – and that’s good news

In our busy, competitive, and achievement-driven world, a hiatus is often seen as… nothing. An empty, unproductive pause. A gap between:

A) what we were doing before, and
B) w hatever we’ll be doing next.

But I believe that view is an illusion.

Because a hiatus isn’t empty — it’s deeply full in its own quiet way.

It’s a fertile space that allows us to digest, process, and grieve what’s ended. To rest. To simply be, gathering strength. It gives us the time to reflect, go inward, and access the wisdom we’ve gained from our past — wisdom that will help guide us into whatever comes next.

A hiatus isn’t a void. It’s a bridge — a living transition — connecting what has been with what is yet to come.

Life Is Always in Motion — Even When It Feels Like It’s Not

We often forget: our lives are in constant flux. Things are always ending. New things are always beginning. And those quiet, uncertain moments in between — the ones that feel like nothing’s happening — are often where deep transformation begins.

Hiatuses might not offer visible progress. But they are not wasted time. They are necessary and productive periods of change, even if they don’t look like it on the outside.

Still, let’s be honest. Hiatuses can be hard

They can feel like you’ve fallen into a hole. Like you’re stuck. Unable to go back to what was, but not yet able to step into what’s next.

The lack of clarity or direction… not having a goal to work toward or progress to measure… can make you feel like life has pressed pause. Add to that the uncertainty of whether you’ll find your way again — it’s no wonder that a hiatus can feel uncomfortable, even stressful.

So how to be in a hiatus?

When life hits pause — whether by choice or circumstance — it can feel unsettling. But a hiatus isn’t a mistake. It’s an invitation. A space where deep healing and quiet transformation can unfold, if we allow it.

So how do we live through it?

Here are 19 supportive practices to help you navigate these in-between times with more ease, grace, and self-compassion – they certainly help(ed) me! 

1 Make your peace with where you are

Being in a hiatus is not a failure — it’s a natural part of life. Remind yourself: these pauses are normal and inevitable. They happen to everyone. They’re not interruptions to your journey; they are the journey.

Try to accept this moment for what it is, instead of resisting it. Fighting where you are will only drain your energy. Let go of the urge to be in control — after all, how much control do we really have in life anyway?

You are here. And that’s okay. Just be here for a while.

2 Practice non-action

When the unknown creeps in, our instinct is often to get busy. Set goals. Make plans. Do something — anything — to escape the discomfort of uncertainty.

But sometimes, the best thing you can do is not do.

Try resisting the urge to structure everything. Let go of the pressure to be productive. Experiment with “not-thinking-it-through” and “not-doing-anything-in-particular.”

Just land where you are — right here, right now — without needing to fix or change it. You might discover it’s not as scary as it seemed.

3 Relax, get still

Settle into not knowing how your life is going to unfold from here. Try seeing this space between “what was” and “what’s next” not as a problem to solve, but as a gift — your chance to pause, breathe, and reset.

Imagine yourself lying on a beach with nowhere to go and nothing to do, soaking up the warmth and listening to the rhythm of the waves. Or taking a break during a long walk, simply soaking in the gorgeous views.

Can you allow yourself to rest like that now? To quiet the noise and be still for a while?

4 Let things sink in – and feel

Give yourself time to arrive where you are. Don’t rush into what’s next just yet. Be gentle with yourself. Let the dust settle.

Ask yourself:

• Where have I come from?

• What’s ended?

• Where am I now?

Let yourself feel whatever emotions come up. Whether they blow through like a storm, linger like a grey sky, or pour out like heavy rain — trust that, like the weather, they will change. Even the hardest feelings will eventually pass.

4 Allow yourself to grieve

Hiatuses often follow some kind of loss — of a person, a job, a dream, a way of life. They leave us feeling shaky, uncertain, or worn out. Grieving is natural. Necessary. And yes — it can be hard.

But avoiding your feelings won’t make them go away. The only way to move through grief is to feel it. Safely. Gently. Bit by bit.

Find a trusted space — with yourself or someone you love and trust — where you can feel what’s there without judgment. Cry if you need to. Speak it. Write it. Let it move through you.

If you worry that strong feelings might swamp you, you can try to limit the time when you’ll allow yourself to feel. Feel for a while, and then go back to something lighter or something practical.

But do give your feelings at least some space to be felt, seen, heard. Sit with them until they pass. I like the notion that feelings are like visitors. We want to open the door, welcome them in, spend time with them, then watch them leave again. We don’t want them to move in!

5 Nourish yourself

The loss that led us into a hiatus can leave us shaky, disappointed or hurt. If we’ve been through a tough time, we might be exhausted or burnt out. Feeling our feelings can be challenging, too. Not knowing what to do next might worry and scare us. Sitting in the uncertainty of a hiatus, we might lose our strength or confidence.

So it’s good to put something back – and a hiatus is the perfect time to do that.

Ask yourself: What would feel truly restorative to me right now?

Maybe it’s warm, nourishing food. A walk in nature. Sleeping in. A heart-to-heart with someone who really listens. Painting, photography, or surrounding yourself with color.

Or try something entirely new — like I did when I took up curling after seeing a beginner’s class in the local paper. That unexpected detour gave me strength, rebuilt my confidence, and brought me respite and unexpected joy during a challenging time.

6 Reflect – leisurely

Once the dust has begun to settle, and the immediate upheaval of what ended has softened, you may naturally enter a reflective space. This is a valuable moment — take your time with it.

Look back at the phase that just ended.

• What was good about it? What was hard?
• What did it give you — and what did you give to it?
• What did you learn? What did you outgrow?

Celebrate your growth. Honour your efforts – both successes and failues. Try not to judge yourself — just observe. Let the insights rise to the surface, gently. These reflections are the seeds of wisdom that will guide your next steps.

And remember: this doesn’t need to be rushed. Reflect slowly. Savour the process.

7 Enjoy the space

When something significant ends — a job, a relationship, a chapter of life — it often leaves behind a strange, spacious silence.

At first, this empty space can feel uncomfortable. Like a gaping hole. You might want to fill it quickly — with activity, distractions, or noise, or numb yourself to it — just to escape the discomfort. But see if you can resist that urge (remember point 2!).

Perhaps then you’ll find that this “hole” is also also an opening, and opportunity — a blank canvas, waiting to be painted with new colours and possibilities.

• Can you enjoy the freedom from old responsibilities and expectations?
• Can you get excited with a sense of possibility for what might lie ahead for you?
• Can you let your imagination wander… and begin to dream again?

Let the empty space become an open door!

8 Work on yourself

Hiatuses often offer us something rare: the time and headspace to look inward.

This can be a powerful opportunity to get curious about yourself.

• How did you show up in your last chapter?
• Where did you grow?
• Where might there be room for more growth, more gentleness, or more truth?

Tend to your emotional landscape. Notice what needs to be released. What needs to be forgiven — in yourself or others. Which wounds still feel raw.

And don’t forget your physical self. If you’ve come through something challenging, your body may need care and replenishment too. (See the points above.)

Help and support can help here. Whether it’s from a coach, a therapist, a support group, or a self-guided programme — you don’t have to do this alone. Having a compassionate guide by your side can turn the work of self-exploration into a meaningful, even joyful, journey.

This is also where I can support you — in clarifying what you want next, discovering your vision for what’s next, and helping you take your first practical steps toward it. This is how you can work with me.

9 Heal

We all want to move on from pain as quickly as possible — to be okay again, to be “over it.” But healing doesn’t work on a schedule. It takes its time — and that’s not a flaw. It’s nature.

So, what if you gave yourself permission to take the time you actually need?

Think of how you’d treat a physical wound: you’d clean it, rest it, protect it, allow it time to heal… and eventually begin to strengthen it again.

Your emotional, psychological wounds deserve the same care. Tend to them with kindness. Rest. Soften. Let the healing happen gradually. When you’re ready, rebuild strength through practices that support your wellbeing — whether it’s therapy, a mindful body practice, journaling, coaching, or something else that feels right to you.

Ask yourself: What do I truly need to heal?

You may already know the answer.

10 Build your inner resources

Healing lays the foundation. Now you can begin to build.

This is your moment to cultivate the inner strengths that will carry you forward — not just into the next phase, but through life itself.

What qualities would support you going forward?

• Patience? Resilience? Strength?
• Courage? Kindness? Compassion — for yourself and others?
• Determination? Confidence? Fighting spirit?
• Boundaries? Self-trust? Flexibility?

This is a chance to deepen your emotional toolkit. You might practice self-reliance or develop your ability to stay calm in conflict. You might reconnect with your joy, playfulness, or sense of humour. Or you might nurture your capacity to love and accept — even when life feels uncertain.

Which inner resources would help you meet your next chapter with more strength and grace?

And how might you begin to grow them now?

11 Stop pushing

I love this quote by Fritz Perls: “Stop pushing. The river flows on its own.”

In Western culture, we’re taught early on to strive, hustle, and make things happen. Work hard. Set goals. Push through. Fight for your dreams.

And that’s not wrong — there’s a place for effort and determination.

But here’s the catch: this mindset often carries the illusion that if we just push hard enough, we can make anything happen. And life doesn’t always work that way. Some things are within our control — but many are not.

Sometimes, the most powerful thing you can do is stop pushing — and trust the natural rhythm of life. Be awake, be aware, and allow things to come to you. Catch the wave when it appears, rather than chasing it across the horizon.

In your hiatus, try letting go. Tune in. Observe. Trust the flow.

12 Keep moving

Letting go, relaxing and healing don’t mean giving up or becoming passive. Quite the opposite.

Even if you don’t feel like you’re making visible progress, the inner work you’re doing — feeling your feelings, staying present, aligning with your truth, listening deeply — is incredibly active.

This kind of stillness is not stuckness.

If you still feel stuck or stagnant, move your body — gently or vigorously, whatever feels good. Dance. Walk. Swim. Practice yoga or martial arts. Run. Stretch. Let your body remind your mind that you’re alive, moving, flowing.

Stay connected. Stay engaged.

13 See the gifts

Every hiatus — no matter how painful — carries its own gifts.

They might not be obvious at first. Especially in the midst of struggle, it’s hard to believe anything good could come from it. But even so, try shifting your focus toward what is good, even in small ways.

• What is now possible that wasn’t before?
• What have you discovered about yourself?
• What are you grateful for — right now, in this moment?

Gratitude grounds us. Years ago, I started the simple practice of writing down three good things about my day each evening — however small. At the bottom of the page, I always write a big, heartfelt THANK YOU.

It helps. Especially in tough times. It keeps things in perspective. And it’s a reminder that beauty, hope, and grace coexist with hardship.

14 Experience new things

A hiatus often comes with a freeing of time, obligations, or expectations. That can be your invitation to try something new!

What have you always wanted to explore? What calls to you, quietly or loudly?

Follow your curiosity. Take a class. Volunteer. Travel. Join a choir. Grow vegetables. Paint. Dance. Sing.

Hopefully, it will lift your energy and give you joy. It might also stimulate your creative juices and help you figure out what you want next in your life. You’ll likely meet new people. And you might start seeing things differently, too.

During one of my own hiatuses, I volunteered at an alpaca farm, helped in a husky shelter in the Swiss Alps, and harvested olives in Sicily. Each experience filled me with new energy, insight, and a sense of connection with life.

Let your choices be guided by joy, not pressure. Experience for the sake of experience.

What might that be for you?

15 Let things emerge and unfold

Now that you’re more at ease with flowing rather than pushing — stay open. Keep watching. Researching. Following hints and intuitive nudges. Be awake to what life offers you.

Let your next chapter emerge, slowly and naturally. Like waves in the sea — your job is to be ready to catch the next one that feels right.

Give it time. Cultivate your patience. You can tend to things, coax them along, but ultimately, things tend to happen in their own time. Like seeds in the soil — your job is to water them. Growth will take care of itself.

Can you trust that what’s meant to unfold… will?

16 Follow your joy

This is one of my most important suggestions.

It isn’t about reckless pleasure-seeking — it’s about tuning into what feels authentically joyful to you. What uplifts your spirit? What makes your heart sing?

Neuroscience tells us that positive, wholesome joy is often a signpost — signaling to our brain and body that something is “right” for us. Joy can be a compass.

So as you explore, ask yourself:

• Does this feel good and right for me?
• Does it bring me quiet contentment or bright excitement?

Don’t overthink it. Feel into it.

If it’s a yes — lean in.

17 Be safe

Hiatuses can bring uncertainty — that’s natural. If you start feeling fearful, anxious, or even panicky, then it’s important to tend to your sense of safety.

First, check: Are you truly safe?

If not — how can you protect yourself or remove yourself from harm? Who can support you?

If you are safe, but still feel anxious — ground yourself.

Lie on the floor and feel the ground beneath you. Put your hands in soil. Walk barefoot. Imagine roots growing from your feet into the earth.

And talk to yourself kindly. Reassure yourself. Just as you would comfort a child or friend, offer yourself that same compassion.

You’re doing your best. You’re allowed to feel unsettled. But right now — in this moment — you’re okay.

18 Trust the process

You don’t have to have it all figured out. Just take the next step that feels right – one at a time.

In my own experience, I’ve seen that you can’t really go wrong. Missed turns often circle back. Detours often lead to hidden treasures. And when something doesn’t feel right anymore — you can always change course.

So: take a step. Feel it out. Pause, adjust, explore. Stay alive to what’s around you. How do you feel? And what calls to you next?

This is the path. You’re already on it. Trust the process.

19 Keep the faith

Have faith: Eventually, your hiatus will come to an end. You’ll find your next wave, your next purpose, your next joy. And you’ll step into your next chapter.

Even if you can’t see it yet — trust that it’s coming. It always does.

After every winter comes a spring. After every pause comes a new beginning. You’ve navigated transitions before — you’ll do it again.

Relax into this space. It’s part of your journey. Let it hold you, shape you, and prepare you for what’s next.

Over to you now…

Tell us about your hiatus experience!

Which strategies have helped you live through it?

What did you learn from it?

Photography: Pixabay